


With Or Without You

by moonsilver_lights



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/F, Heartbreak, Pining, bi!hermione granger, lesbian!pansy parkinson
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2019-10-17
Packaged: 2020-12-21 03:11:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21067841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonsilver_lights/pseuds/moonsilver_lights
Summary: Hope you like it! This was supposed to be a fluffy pining fic, but...





	With Or Without You

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it! This was supposed to be a fluffy pining fic, but...

_“See the stone set in your eyes,_

_See the thorn twist in your side._

_I’ll wait for you.”_

It had been thirty-two days since Pansy Parkinson walked into Hogwarts and refused to look at Hermione Granger.

The students started to pile up the blankets on their beds and try to wear muggle sweaters underneath their robes as the temperatures decreased and they began preparing for the slip into icy winter. Hagrid was tending more carefully to his pumpkin patch, the plump orange plants growing by the day. Harry Potter was more famous than ever, both in the wizarding world as the Chosen One and in the muggle world as the mysterious gentleman who single-handedly stopped the terrorists that the Prime Minister himself would not confront. Everything seemed like it was normal.

It wasn’t, though.

Because Pansy Parkinson would not look at Hermione Granger.

And Hermione Granger couldn’t reciprocate.

With Harry spending all of his free time with Ginny, who he had made up with over the summer, and Ron desperately trying to keep up with his classes (with Hermione’s help, of course), Hermione didn’t have much to do outside of her homework. Once she and Ron had decided that the kiss during the Battle of Hogwarts was a fluke and that they were better of as friends, her social life was limited to what it was before - perhaps even less.

Hermione needed something to occupy her time with, and for whatever stupid reason, she chose Pansy Parkinson.

More specifically the way her neck was exposed by her her short crop of black hair, her her pale, slender fingers were pink and frostbitten at the edges after a walk out in the cold. Her shoulder exposed in the warmer months as she sat in the eighth year common room with nothing but a tank top and some shorts. Her proud, confident stance that made Hermione want to be pushed up against a wall and taken complete control of. Her deep plum lipstick that she never seemed to be without. Hermione didn’t miss the days when Pansy would come ever so slightly late to breakfast, a little out of breath and with reddened cheeks.

Recently, Hermione started to notice some other things which made her blush even more when she thought about.

It was Pansy’s excitement when she knew an answer in potions. Her expression when she was reading, detached into another world and considering thoughts and ideas that Hermione wanted to explore.

How Pansy’s blue eyes sparkled whenever her friends made her laugh and how Hermione needed to be the reason that they shone. How infuriating it was that she wouldn’t let Hermione explore those eyes properly.

As the days progressed and Hermione continued to observe and admire from afar, other, less favourable events came to her attention.

How the other students, even the Hufflepuffs and some of the Slytherins, turned a cold shoulder to Pansy Parkinson when she walked past. When she asked to borrow a quill, the awkward silence that followed before someone uncomfortably tossed a quill onto her desk. How they refused to take it back. The quiet gasps that followed Pansy drawing her wand, even if it was to do something as mundane and simple as fill a glass of water or summon a textbook.

One day as she was studying in the library, trying to focus on her book but finding Pansy’s jaw much more enticing, Hermione caught two sixth-year Gryffindors snickering in Pansy’s direction. Anger coiled in her stomach and she gave them a glare that would have frightened the proudest and bravest of the students there. She slammed down her book in frustration and anger, crossing her arms and getting a stern look from Madam Pince.

“It’s not fucking fair,” she hissed to Ron and Harry, keeping her voice down.

“What is?” Harry asked obliviously, looking up from the quidditch magazine he was reading.

Hermione restrained from advising him on his studying habits with difficulty and instead answered his question. “The way they’re treating her,” she said, disgusted, throwing another glare in the direction of the sixth-years who had gone back to their whispering.

“Who?”

“Pansy! What are you, fucking thick, Harry?” Madam Pince looked back at them and Hermione lowered her voice.

“Blimey, Hermione, you’re going to have us all thrown out,” Ron warned.

There was a moment of silence, and Hermione thought that was the end of the conversation before Harry added: “Well, don’t you think she deserves it? Just a little bit?” At a disbelieving look from Hermione, he amended: “Only with what she said, and all. Don’t you remember? She was ready to hand me in.”

“Unbelievable,” Hermione hissed. “Unbelievable! Do you really think anyone deserves that?” She was standing now, her two companions looking at her wide eyed as she raised her voice. “Do you think anyone deserves to be ostracised? Bullied? After what happened to you in fifth year? Don’t look at me like that, you know it was the same. Better, even. I’ve had enough of you.”

Hermione sweeped all of her books into her bag, ignoring the wide eyes of her classmates and the withering glare of Madam Pince. She stormed out so fast that she almost missed the fact that Pansy looked her in the eye for the first time in over a month. She wouldn’t have forgiven herself if she had missed that.

As Hermione walked out into the hall with her bag hanging over her shoulder, still swinging slightly from the momentum, she realised with horror what she had just done. Yelled at her two best and only friends in the middle of a crowded library. Yelled about her secret Slytherin crush and two gossiping Gryffindors.

She was grateful that the corridors were empty during free periods, as most people were either studying in the library or spending time in the common rooms or outside. This way, no one could see the tears streaming down her face in an unstoppable river.

All the feelings she had been harbouring in her gut for months finally pushed through to exhibit themselves on her body. Anger, sadness, love, jealousy, regret, but most of all longing. Longing for the girl she couldn’t have.

Hermione Granger didn’t know how long it was before the tears stopped flowing, but when they did a small smile appeared on her face. Because Pansy Parkinson looked her in the eye for the first time in over a month. Her eyes looked more beautiful that Hermione had known.

Maybe, if she was lucky, Hermione Granger had a chance. Either way, she knew that she would wait. She would wait for Pansy Parkinson.


End file.
